What is the real question?

Sunday 12:51pm

I recently finished the book 'Health at Every Size' by Linda Bacon.  It was interesting.

My summary of the HAES guidelines re approach to food:

•    Eat delicious food

•    Eat mindfully

•    Eat to be satisfied - comfortable and energized ('an elegant sufficiency')

•    Honour food and the act of nourishing yourself

•    Find grounding and contentment/pleasure outside of food

•    Respect your hunger and appetite, not just for food but for life and purpose and meaning

I’d like to be able to eat like that.  They seem like good guidelines to me.  I’m thinking more and more that this is not about food and my body but about routine.  For example, eating something different scares me just as much as altering my routine in another way such as walking for five minutes less per day, or switching the times of lunch and dinner. 

I listened to a podcast on self-love yesterday and two questions stuck in my mind;

1.     What life do I believe I am worthy of living?

I don’t know how to answer this one right now...

2.     What do I get out of being thin?

Um … nothing. 

Except an excuse to hide behind, to escape LIFE.

Do I want to look like I do?

No. 

I am more than my body.  Perhaps the thing you first notice about most people you meet is their appearance, but once you get to know them it’s really their soul that you see; their inner essence that is conveyed in their expression, their body language, their voice, actions and words.  I don’t want to be a person who is defined by her body.